Monday, April 23, 2007

Dumbest Statement Ever

I'll take people who should shut up and sing, for 800, Alex! Today's finalist: singer/global warming activist Sheryl Crow. Hey, don't get me wrong--I recycle, even care a little about the overall health of the planet. I mean, yeah, I think Al Gore's a little overwrought, and I'm amused every time an anti-global-warming event gets snowed out, but I wouldn't count myself as hostile to environmentalism. But Sheryl Crow's latest suggestion... not. On a recent blog post, covered in this BBC story, she says that we should all do our part by imposing a strict limit of a single square of TP per sitting. Maybe in extreme cases, 2 or 3. (Remember that Seinfeld episode: "I do not have a square to spare?") She doesn't suggest how the limit would be enforced... potty police, anyone? Oh, and while we're at it, paper napkins are out, too. Her new line of clothing features a detachable "dining sleeve" that you can wipe your mouth on, and then remove and wash. I don't know how she feels about kleenex, but if she's going to patent a "snot sleeve," my 10-year-old son should get a royalty; he's been using one for years. Seriously, you can't make up stuff this funny.

3 comments:

Paul Murphy said...

I lived in single bathroom house with four other guys. TP disappeared faster than pizza at a bolemia group therapy session. We were going to put a coin opperated machine next to the john to distribute TP.

Lori Fitzgerald said...

And now she says it was all just a big joke. Wonder if she'll say the same thing about killing unborn babies next week. Try to be more of a man than Lance Armstrong, Sheryl.

Danny Baddeley said...

She obviously doesn't have IBS.